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The Merger Quotes

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See episode The Merger

Dwight: I am fast. To give you a reference point. I'm somewhere between a snake and a mongoose. And a panther.


Pam: Am I being mean to Dwight? I don't know, I did just make him run around the building, and I have no intention of timing him - this isn't even a stopwatch, it's a digital thermometer! He does make my life harder sometimes, and on purpose - like, he tried to put meters on the bathroom stalls as a way of bringing in more money for the company...I should really get back to work.


Dwight: Dwight Schrute, Assistant Regional Manager.
Andy: Andy Bernard, Regional Director in charge of Sales.
Dwight: So, you'll be reporting to me, then...
Andy: Um, on the contrary...
Dwight: My title has "manager" it is...
Andy: And I'm a "director"....


Andy: Am I trying to get under his skin? Yes...because, the angrier (Dwight) gets, the more marginalized he becomes. Meanwhile, Andy Bernard is out there...layin' on the charm.


Stanley: I don't know who these new people think they are; I've sat downwind of Phyllis's stinky perfumes for years...never said a word.


Martin: What the hell is with this guy?
Stanley: Got an hour? I'll try to explain.


Stanley: Trust me, it only gets worse!
Martin: Is he always like this?
Ryan: Sometimes he brings more costumes...
Hannah: When do people work?
Phyllis: We find little times during the day.
Karen: How are we gonna get home?
Phyllis: Bob Vance has an air pump - he said he'd fill all our tires up...
Karen: Bob Vance, of Vance Refrigeration?

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