Michael: I'm going in for a procedure today.
Oscar: Is everything okay?
Michael: Yeah, it's routine. I'm just a little bit scared.
Oscar: I'm sure everything will be fine. [pulls up a chair] What do you? What's the procedure, if you don't mind my asking?
Michael: It is a colonoscopy.
Michael: In your experience, what should I be expecting in terms of sensation or emotions? [Oscar looks irritated and frustrated] Is there anything I can do to make it more pleasurable for me or for Dr. Shaundry?
Oscar: Oh my God.
Michael: My main concern, should I have a safe word?
Oscar: Yeah. [gets up and walks out]
Dwight: (reacting to Jim being promoted to co-regional manager) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!