Michael considers himself to be an eloquent, witty, and entertaining public speaker. However, throughout the series he botches the delivery and use of common phrases and idioms.
- In "Broke", Michael says to Charles Miner and David Wallace "How the turntables." (How the tables have turned.). In this same episode he says "our balls are in your court" (the ball is in your court).
- In "Michael's Birthday", Michael says to Pam that her breasts are "ticking time bags" (time bombs).
- In a talking-head interview in "Prince Family Paper", Michael states that "The business world is a doggy-dog world." instead of dog eat dog world.
- In "Casino Night", Michael says that he is going to "drop a deuce on everyone" by bringing two dates to the party; the correct expression is "drop a bomb on everyone." "Dropping a deuce" is a slang reference to having a bowel movement.
- In "Phylis' Wedding" Michael's speech confuses "wedding" with
"welding" and "metals" with "medals".
- In "The Surplus", he says that the chairs are "urkelnomical" (ergonomic).
- In 'Stress Relief' Michael says "No rest for the sick," he is incorrectly quoting a
well known biblical expression, "No rest for the wicked," or perhaps "No rest for the weary," another common idiom.
- In "Dinner Party", Michael says the wine has an "oaky afterbirth" instead of aftertaste.
- In "The Convention ", Michael says to Jim "The Progidal [sic]... my son returns", which should be "The prodigal son returns." another phrase Michael botches in this episode is that he asks Dwight to get the dirt on Josh and see if he has any "Skeletons in his attic." instead of skeletons in his closet.
- In "New Boss" he accuses someone of being hypercritial instead of hypocritical.
- In "Casual Friday", Michael says "I am not to be truffled with." (trifled)
- In "The Cover Up", after Pam explains that running amok means out of control, Michael later uses it, " It's too late to undo it. I need to know. Otherwise this thing is going to spiral out of amok." but he should have said out of control.
- In "Traveling Salesmen", Michael speaks of Dwight's betrayals in a talking head segment- "You know what they say: fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice... strike three" instead of "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me".
- While filming his apology video in "Product Recall", Michael defends his honor by declaring, "It wasn't me (who put the obscene watermark on our paper). They are trying to make me an escape goat" instead of scape goat.
- In "St. Patrick's Day" Michaels says the phrase "fool disclosure" instead of "full disclosure.
- In "The Whistleblower" Michael says to Pam "My mind is going a mile an hour."; instead of "My mind is going a mile a minute."
- In "The Negotiation", Michael says to Jan, "It was a crime of passion, Jan, not a disgruntled employee. Everyone here is extremely gruntled." Michael's use of the word 'gruntled' is actually correct, however unusual.
- In "Body Language", Michael says "I have your baugette." He meant to say barrette.
- In "Secret Santa", Michael says
- to Stanley, "You're going to H - E - L - L - double hockey sticks." (H - E - double hockey sticks)
- to David, that Jesus "can heal leopards" (lepers), "has the power of flight" (walking in water, possibly) and that Phyllis has "uslurped" (usurped) his role as Santa
- In "New Boss", Michael says to Charles Miner that he is being "hypercritical" (hypocritical).
- In "Dream Team", Michael says "You know what they say, keep your friends close." (Keep your friends close and your enemies closer)
- In "The Delivery", Michael says that Pam is "contrapting" (contracting).
- In "The Whistleblower", Michael refers to Angela as Andy's "spermed lover" (he means 'spurned').
- In "Nepotism", Michael says "there are a lot of different schools on capital punishment" (corporal punishment).
- In "Costume Contest", Michael says Darryl "backstabs people in the back" (backstabs people or stabs people in the back).