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Michael: All right, everybody... Oh my God, Pam, those make you look so ugly. Um, Pam, in order to get hotter, you take the glasses off. You're moving in the wrong direction...
Pam: I don't have my contacts...
Michael: Ub, dub dah, don't need, I can't even hear you. It's just noise coming out of an ugly scientist.
Stanley: It's like I used to tell my wife - I do not apologize unless I think I'm wrong, and if you don't like it, you can leave. And I say the same thing to my current wife, and I'll say it to my next one too.
Creed: A lot of jazz cats are blind, but they can play the piano like it's nobody's business - I'd like to put the piano in front of Pam - without her glasses - and see what happens. I'd also like to see her topless.